This can be anything from a standing date night, to the understanding that you two split up at Costco to get double the samples. If he finds these traditions important, it means he’s established a structure in his life that you’re a necessary part of.
2. He senses when you’re feeling off.
If you’ve had a bad day, watched too many “Colorblind man sees color for the first time,” videos and you’re in a funk, or even if you’re just PMSing, and he senses something is wrong, he’s in tune with your non-verbal cues and can pick them up from a mile away. That’s real intimacy.
3. He respects your routines.
For some people taking an hour-long shower is pure necessity. Or maybe you like to watch E! after dinner blissfully uninterrupted. If he accepts the routines that keep you balanced, even if he doesn’t get them, it means he accepts you for who you really are, and not just when you’re on your best behavior.
4. He pitches in.
Someone who takes on housekeeping duties, or offers to run to pick up the take out, or valiantly kills the bugs you can’t handle wants to be a contributing part in the structure of your life. Letting you lean on him so that your life is a little easier is a non-verbal way of telling you he loves you.
5. He ditches the phone when you need him to.
We all hit a level of comfort with our partners where we know they won’t be offended if we scroll through our twitter feeds at dinner. But if he can identify when you need some quality time, and is willing to put the phone down, it means he values you above whatever the internet has to offer.
6. He talks about your future together.
Talking about your future transitions into planning to be in it, and voicing those hopes. It shows that he’s not afraid to think about you long-term, and even excited about the prospect.
7. He’s into the comfortable silences.
Being alone together is the hallmark of comfortable love. If you’ve got a clinger who doesn’t seem comfortable with the two of you doing your own thing while sharing the same space, (or if you’re the clinger) there’s a good chance he doesn’t feel like there’s enough love in the relationship, and needs the validation of being paid attention to all the time.
8. He likes to include you in mundane decision-making.
Being in a rock solid relationship means discussing big decisions with each other. But if he still feels like he needs your input when he’s purchasing sweatpants or deciding which setting to use on the dryer, it means that he values your input across the board, and that you add value to his daily life.
9. He’s still playful.
Old relationships sometimes have the reputation of being dusty or joyless, but a loving seasoned relationship still has plenty moments of joy, and aren’t just reduced to two people living parallel to each other. If he’s still exhibiting those traits that charmed you in the beginning, it’s a sign that he still feels that spark that initially drew you to each other.
10. He embraces your less-than-charming habits.
Early on, everyone is still hiding their bad habits and quirks, and when they’re finally revealed it can be a make or break moment. If you and your partner live together, or have been together for a while, there’s a good chance he’s seen the gambit, and if he’s still around, and not nagging you about every hairball on the bathroom floor, or the sleep-yoga you do when you’ve had too much caffeine, it means he loves and accepts every fiber of your being. Even the uncute fibers.